Young Millionaire Group

Some barriers are used for protection.  Safety glasses protect you from flying debris, whatever you are doing.  They help keep a vital organ protected.  They are a barrier.  Removal of this barrier at an improper moment can mean the loss of sight.  Proper vision in your life is just as important.  However, there is a barrier you may want to remove from sight.

Many people write down goals.  However their goals are too general to ever really reach.  Here is an example:

I would like a nice home, in a nice neighborhood with nice friends etc.

These are NOT goals.  They are nice thoughts and dreams.  To properly set goals, you need significant definition.  This is a fundamental barrier to success for some.

Let me give you a visual.  Many people set physical goals.  One of them it to get defined.  Here are two examples of defined:

#1.  This man (Good Definition) has definition….the right definition.

#2.  This man (Bad Definition) has definition….the wrong definition, but definition nevertheless.

They both are defined.  They both have six-pack abs.  However, their definition is completely different.  You have to be specific!

Would you like your doctor working on a heart issue with crystal clear x-rays or fuzzy x-rays.  You wouldn’t dream of letting them just wander around your body.

What would you prefer your wedding pictures to be, defined or fuzzy.  It sounds silly to allow these things to happen.  However, we have a tendency to do this with our life and our time.  You shouldn’t allow a lack of definition in any of these areas.  Neither should you allow yourself to wander around life with non-specific goals.

Your detail in your goal set will largely determine if you achieve your dreams.  If they are just general items and not highly specific, you are really NOT interested in achieving them, they are just nice thoughts.

Many people have nice thoughts.  But, they will never achieve anything.  If you want to define your dreams, then they must have intracate details to them.  If you want a nice home, what does that mean to you, exactly?

Does the home have an entryway?  How many square feet?  How many bedrooms?  What is the cost of the home?  Where is the home?  Does the home have granite counters, stone counters or formica?  Does each room have its own bathroom?  How tall are the ceilings?  Is it on the mountain or on the beach?  Doea it have a sprinkler system?  Is it on a golf course?

The point of this is intricate detail breeds thoughts in your mind that will help you accomplish your goals.  That detail causes an effect on the human mind.  It creates a need to achieve them.  It enables the creativity to flow and motivate the mind to create the necessary actions.

Get specific.  Drive your goals home in your mind first and the unique material you were born with will strive to reach those defined objective.

Rob Wheeler

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies.. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten.

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school. 2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time. 3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile. 4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special!!

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials..the most money…or the most awards. They simply are the ones who care the most.

What if there were a barrier you couldn’t see at all?  Would that barrier scare you?  Watch this short video:

A jet screams through the sound barrier.  How do you even “REALLY” define barriers you cannot see?  How can something you cannot see affect you?

The barriers we deal with on a daily basis can be daunting.  Today we will talk about a barrier that is unseen.  These unseen barriers carry the most sinister consequences if not navigated properly.

Many people only want to succeed in one area of their life.  Others want to succeed in every area of their life.  Still others define success monetarily, while even more define success in the materials (toys) they have gathered.  Many women define success solely in their children and everything surrounding them and their success.  While this is noble, they are not giving themselves credit for the many other things that they do and can do.

How you define success can be as different as the sands of the earth.  How YOU define success makes all the difference in the world.

Do you define success in relationships and religion or do you define success in emotional stability and finances?  You are going to define success according to you.  No one else can do this drill for you.  You must decide what your definition is and how to achieve it.

There are seven key areas to measure success:

Spiritual
Social
Mental
Emotional
Physical
Financial
Material

In each area you need to define what you consider “success”.  Once you have defined that you can begin to align yourself with your values and goals so that they meet and makes sense.  As you do this, remember the sound barrier and what you cannot see, CAN affect you in significant ways.

When you talk about spiritual many people believe that it is a religious definition.  While that is true for many, it may not be true for you.

To properly define your success you must first have set your values.  You can use the resource box below to find how to set your values.  Once you have defined your values, now you can work on your personal definition of success.

These are NOT goals.  They are definitions of success.  Goals will be far beyond this category.

Take each of the categories above and write down what you believe is your definition of success is in each category.

Rob Wheeler

During the cold war a reminder of the separation of Germany was the Berlin Wall. This barrier existed during one of the most notorious periods of Chaos in the life of Germany. It was a constant reminder of the unwanted presence of a difference country who invaded the country, lives and culture of an entire people. Talk about a barrier!!!

If my blog allowed sub-titles the sub-title for this one would be: Aligning Your Life by Defining Your Values

In many instances a person will wonder, “Why am I conflicted inside?” I am working on my goals and following my dreams?

We often wonder why such events occur in our lives. For those who have never thought about it, it can present a troubling aura around daily living. This feeling of conflict or dissonance is called “Chaos”.

Chaos stems from our core value set not being clearly defined and our actions being incongruent with our underlying “value set”. That lack of congruency while real, does not manifest itself clearly to us as a result of our value sets not being defined. Moreover, we struggle with it on a daily basis as a result of not even knowing that the problem exists.

Defining values can be more fundamental to our happiness than we ever imagined. It can help us to understand ourselves, our relationships our spirituality and our moral standards. This definition can help alleviate the daily worries and anxiety that we experience.

Many people write down their goals. This is a good thing. However, if your goals conflict with your underlying value set, then you have the same problem all over again. Value sets must be determined PRIOR to goals being set or CHAOS will ensue.

So, how do we define values? I have often wondered how to gather the resources together to aid in this. Well, the internet has obliged. In the resource box below is a link to a page I have set up specifically for helping you define your values. There are three aids that I think will help tremendously; Value Sheet, Personal Affirmation and List of Values. With these three and the explanation below, you should be able to define your core value set and align it to a personal affirmation.

With these tools you can begin to truly align your value sets with your goals and remove the chaos that this misalignment may have caused in your life. WARNING: This drill may produce significantly different results than you were expecting. It did for me.

So, here’s how we do it!

#1.  Take the master list of values and circle every value that you really think aligns to you. Be generous and circle who you really are.
#2.  Go back and place a rectangle around the twenty or less that describe who you most want to be.
#3.  From that twenty, take a highlighter and highlight the 12 that are critical to you.
#4.  Number them from one to twelve.
#5.  Write the top ten on your Value Sheet.

This drill will help you define and decide how you want to live. Not in the specifics, but in the underlying values you want yourself to live by and others to see.

Compare your results to your goals. Do they match? If they do not, this may be why you have experienced that chaos in your life. Not to worry, we can realign them very easily. Goals change with life experience and knowledge. You may have a different set of knowledge now and you can put that knowledge to use using the tools provided here.

Remember, each day you have a chance to start with a blank slate. You can choose to be better, more confident, more aligned and happy or you can choose to remain static.

Rob Wheeler

An iceberg is a devious barrier with the most damaging parts of it underneath the water sometimes impervious to sight.

The Titanic was suppose to be the “unsinkable” ship.  An iceberg took it out easily and many people perished as a result of this unseen or unperceived barrier

There are some barriers in our lives that don’t seem to be that large when we first look at them.  However, when you look underneath the barrier it is larger than you ever imagined.  How you deal with these “unseen” barriers will determine largely how well you succeed in your business and personal life.

Today we will be addressing one of these unseen barriers.  Personal motivation is an unseen barrier.  It is internal, self determined and self handled.

I remember my dad coming into my room and saying, “Time for school!”

It was soooo hard to get up to go to school, and I liked school.  My motivation level for school was just not at a level to ensure consistent participation.  What gets you motivated?  Have you found that special “thing” that motivates you?

Martin Luther King says:

“I say to you, this morning, that if you have never found something so dear and precious to you that you will die for it, then you aren’t fit to live.”

What are you willing to DIE for.

I have heard it said that if your why doesn’t make you cry, its not big enough.

There are many things that motivate us, but they are usually broken into two categories.  Desperation and Inspiration.  People that are motivated by desperation find that their motivation usually is a temporary motivation and will dissipate as soon as the situation that caused the desperation has been resolved or eliminated.  Desperate people react to situations.

Inspiration on the other hand can have a significantly longer time span because it is rooted in the subconscious.  It is built from a deep mission or longing.  It will not dissipate with results.  Rather with results, it will build excitement spurring additional results and desire.  Inspired people are proactive.

It has been said that you can lead a horse to water, but you can NOT make him drink.  While this is fundamentally true, if you feed a horse salt pellets along the way, the horse will drink the water without you having to ask.

There is a measure of of pure determination and disciple in any motivation.  That is why it is important to find that which inspires you.  Motivation starts with self.  However, it should extend to others to ensure that your mission gets traction toward completion.

Matthew McConahey really caught the vision in the film We Are Marshall.

Will you “lay it on the line” today?  Inspiration beats desperation every time.

Here are a few things you can do to help in the motivation process:

• Dream Big – Visualize what your successful day will look like.
• Speak it out loud
• Choose to have the right attitude
• Believe in yourself
• Give yourself the time to succeed
• Remove Negative/Abusive People from your circle of influence.
• Read positive/inspirational materials
• Determine in your mind that you will NEVER give up.
• Break tasks into smaller parts
• Seek inspiration from those who have traveled the same path and are successful
• Build a positive group of Key Resources^TM
• Music is a master motivator.  Use it to your advantage
• Living things motivate.  Keep things that are alive around you.
• Become a life long student of your industry choice
• Reward yourself for reaching a goal

These things will ensure that you keep yourself motivated.  Listen to motivating people and watch motivating material.  Seek your true inspiration to ensure that you have the energy and drive to succeed.

Listen to Gene Hackman:

You don’t need a sports movie to create motivation.  Notice that each coach here is programming the athletes mind in preparation for performing above the normal abilities.  You can program you mind the exact same way.

Choose to be better.

Rob.

We hear the announcers voice each time a goal is scored in soccer.  The excitement of scoring a goal is real, tangible and measurable.

We should have the same excitement as we “score” (reach) our goals in life.  There are seven areas in which we can define and measure.

One thing that will help you to write goals that will spur you on to achievement is to write the goal in such a way as though you already have achieved the goal.

If your goal is to reach a certain sales level by December 31, 2008.  An example would be:

I am depositing a $35,000 commission check for reaching 1.5 Million in sales this year           Dec, 31, 2008

The model is:  State goal as though you have achieved it. Write the date of proposed achievement.

Try it on the sheets below.  The red links have PDF blank sheets attached to them.

Spiritual

The first area of concern is setting your spiritual goals.  Notice, I did not not say religious.  It doesn’t matter what religion you are or if you choose no religion at all.  Each of us has a spiritual side to our lives.  Break down that spirituality into defineable and measurable units

Social

The second area to address is social goals.  These are goals that you set to work on people skills in a social setting.  This can be friendships, networking, non-profit work or any area where you create a scenario where there is strong social interaction.

Mental

The area is where you challenge your mind.  Sudoku, crossword puzzles and word finds are some examples.  Many families play games.  Keeping your mind sharp ensures that you are ready to identify those opportunities that cross your plate that make sense.

Emotional

Emotional goals are very important.  Do you control your anger, jealousy?  Do you have a hold on your anxiety?  Can you accept someone else’s opinion as it is?  This area helps you to create and define a plan to execute the steps necessary to grow in this area.

Physical

This is a sensitive area.  So, I will just ask, where are your priorities as far as your health and wellness are concerned?  Are you on a path to health or death?  Are you proactively addressing future potential health issues with your diet, exercise?  This area of your goals will challenge you to new heights of commitment.

Financial

Did you know money is the #1 cause of divorce?  Whether you married or not, this area will help you define and do the things necessary to handle your finances as they exist now while planning for the future.

Material

What are the items that you are going to acquire and how will the help you and your family?  Are they toys or assets.

Setting your goals can be a most liberating experience as you formulate the plan to achieve YOUR dreams.  It is ok to work for another while you are reaching for the stars.  However, always ensure that you have your plan in mind and that you are not being driven by another’s dreams and aspirations.

An man took his new employee out to his farm because he liked the employee.  He showed him all the land, beautiful houses and barns, swimming pool, pond and his many play toys.  He said, “My boy, see this land?  If you work hard for another 20 or 30 years, all of this will finally be mine!”

You see the man understood leverage.  He understood that if you leverage someone else for long enough, that person will pay you many times what you pay them.

Step up to center field and start aiming for your goals.

For more complete information on goals, visit my GOAL PAGE.

Rob Wheeler

There is an old joke that as far as breakfast goes the pig is committed and the chicken is just involved.

Are you just involved in life or are you committed? During the Chinese crackdown on democracy at Tianemen Square there were many demonstrations about commitment. However, none seemed to capture the world so much as “Tank Man”.

Talk about commitment!  He was willing to stand in front of oncoming ROLLING tanks.  He realized that he was as committed as he could be to the ideals he stands for.  John F. Kennedy has a favorite poem.  It is Ulysses by Alfred Tennyson.  You can read the whole poem at:

In the poem an old King looks back on younger days.  However, in the last stanza he states:

We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are,–
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.

Not to yield?  Never give up!  Keep going!  Keep striving to reach all those things that you have committed to.  There are pledges and promises that you make constantly.  You make these oaths to your friends, family, co-workers and to those who look up to you, whom you do not yet realize.  They are your true audience.  Challenge yourself to do the best you can at all things so that those who are watching, and oh so many are watching, can benefit from seeing true commitment.  Edward Hale may have said it best:
I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything,
But still I can do something.
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do
The something that I can do.

I don’t care if you are one and ONLY one.  You can make a difference.  You can change the world!

Princess Diana talked about doing what you really believe you should do.  That will help you to ensure that there is a deep commitment to complete all the tasks because You want to.  She said:

“Only do what your heart tells you to.”

She saved hundreds, if not thousands with her efforts to remove landmines.  Look at the first word she chose.  ONLY!!!!  Only do what will ensure that you keep your promises.  Then you don’t have to worry about motivation as much.

Thomas Jefferson as he wrote the Declaration of Independence included these words.  What a commitment they were.  Would you sacrifice as much if needed?:

“We mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honour.”

Would you give up your life, fortune and even your honor to keep those commitments that you promise to deliver on.  The founding fathers did!

What are your willing to give up to achieve that which means so much to you?  What can you leave behind, so that you can move ahead.  Your reputation, your “status”.  Who cares what other people think.  If you knew how little they think about you, you would not worry so much about what they think.

Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez upon reaching the Mexican continent had his 11 ships burned.  Whether his men were committed or not, Cortez was.  He was going to conquer the new world at any cost up to and including his own very life.  No retreat, conquer or be conquered.

David McNally said, “Commitment is the enemy of resistance, for it is the serious promise to press on, to get up, no matter how many times you are knocked down.”

My father, Thomas L. Wheeler said once, “Rob its not how far you fall, but rather how high you bounce.”

We are going to get knocked down, bullied, told no, rejected, unrequited…etc.  No matter how many times it hurts, we HAVE to get up.  What number of times will it take you being knocked down to stay down.  I say, I DON’T know yet and I ain’t gonna find out, ’cause I WILL get back up!

Vince Lombardi the great coach of the Green Bay Packers, talks about commitment from a team standpoint:

Individual commitment to a group effort — that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work.

So, the individual has to commit to the team, company, society, work, civilization as a whole or whatever he or she is involved in for the whole to work as a team.  So, there is an “I” in TEAM.  The “I” is “I commit to the team!!”

Even the english language places importance on it.  According to the dictionary, commitment is a noun.  A noun is a person, place or thing.  They are all concrete, physical, defineable stuff.

Here are some solid steps to handling commitments:

#1.  Define the commitments you have made.  Write them down.

#2.  Define who they were made to.  Again, write them down.

#3.  Determine those you can keep -vs- those you will not.

#4.  Go talk to the people whom you made the commitments you are NOT going to keep and apologize.

#5.  Redouble your efforts to keep those which you will keep.

#6.  Carefully consider all future commitments and don’t commit to those you can’t keep.

These steps may seem simple.  However, they take time, emotion and effort.  One of the biggest problems many of us experience is over-commitment.  Your time is your most valuable asset protect it for you, your family and career to ensure that you can keep your promises.

Like the pig, Tank Man and Cortez, if you are going to commit.  Doit!  Go the whole way!  If you are not, then don’t.

Rob Wheeler.

Holding back a tremendous force can be a daunting task.  In 1931 construction began on the Hoover Dam.

This barrier holds back the Colorado River and all of its force.  When it was completed in 1935 it was the largest concrete structure in the entire world.  It holds back 28,537,000 acre feet of water at full pool.  It is 726.4 feet tall and the parapets rise another 40 feet beyond that.  The water pressure is 45,000 pounds per square foot.

The Colorado river with all its force and desire to get around it, can’t!

Webster’s defines desire as:

1.	to wish or long for; crave; want.

2.	to express a wish to obtain; ask for; request: The mayor desires your presence at the next meeting.

3.	a longing or craving, as for something that brings satisfaction or enjoyment: a desire for fame.

4.	an expressed wish; request.

5.	something desired.

6.	sexual appetite or a sexual urge.

For our purposes we will defer to 1 or 3.  You have to want success badly.  You have to have a “white hot burning desire” to create the kind of success you want to create.  It has to “transcend” everything.  Researchers have found that the desire to succeed is critically tied to success.  Moreover, it actually has the capability to reduce the stresses surrounding you along the way to success.

A young man went in search of a grand old Sherpa philosopher to ask him the meaning of desire.  He found the master and asked him, “What does desire really mean?”.

The old prophet said, “Follow me!”.  They hiked up a mountain.  The youth was exhausted.  They hiked around a mountain.  Now the youth was even more tired, sore and mentally done.  Finally, they reached a crystal clear blue/green lake in the mountain pass.  The Sherpa master waded out into the lake and stuck his head in the water.  He asked the youth to come to him and look at what desire is.  The youth, tired and sore, waded into the sharply cool water to where the old man was standing and reluctantly plunged his head in.  The master reached out his hand and held the young man, underwater, until the youth fought away from him.

He lunged out of the water to gasp the precious air that was so needed.  “Why did you do that?” the young man said exasperatedly.

The old master smiled.  Looking into the eyes and soul of the youth, he said, “My child, when you want something as bad as you want to fill your lungs after a period of no air, you will master desire.”

Think of that!  How many times in your life has desire been so keen that you will fight for it with that type of intensity and desperation?  How often have you been truly under water?  I would venture to say very few if none.  Our society is breeding an entitled youth.  For you to change the tide, you personally must sacrifice all to obtain what you desire.

The great Chinese philosopher Confuscious states:

“The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential… these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.”

Napoleon Hill in his book Think and Grow Rich said it this way:

“Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire that transcends everything”

Do you have a keen “pulsating” desire.  Pulsating implies that the desire is consistent and in your face until you address it.  Does your desire transcend everything?  What are you leaving in the way of your success?  What are you not sacrificing to achieve what you must achieve?  This desire has to be intense and overwhelming.

Napoleon Hill also states:

“There is one quality which one must possess to win, and that is definiteness of purpose, the knowledge of what one wants, and a burning desire to possess it.”

If this is the case philosophically and factually, we must develop that desire.  The key word in that sentence is “develop”.  Most desire is not white hot burning desire initially.  It is a mind taught function.  Contrary to popular belief, your mind completely controls this process.

Most of that control starts with self-suggestion.  You can self-suggest your way to almost any outcome you wish to program.  I have heard many times from different people how they have lost their desire with regard to something.  It may be a spouse losing desire for their loved one physically.  It may be the desire to get healthy or stay healthy.  It may be desire to continue working in their chosen field or company.  It may be to continue down a spiritual path you have been on for a while.

I can state emphatically, whatever you truly choose that you want to do, you can develop a strong desire to comlpete the tasks or project with a newly developed desire.

8 Steps to Creating Desire (a white hot burning desire):

1.  Determine the values that you want to be a part of your Personal Philosophy.

2.  Determine the path/person/object/project or goal that you want to obtain.

3.  Define that path clearly with stated goals both short, medium and long term.

4.  Share that path with at least 5 people close to you.

5.  Create a delayed gratification plan.  Delayed gratification is where you put off some reward or item until you reach a predetermined result.

6.  Create an affirmation that clearly states what you want to desire.

7.  At least 4 times a day, state your affirmation out loud.  This engages more of your senses than just reading it.  Self affirmation is critical to success and the road to success.  What a man/woman thinks about constantly fervently, he or she will become.

8.  Create a system to measure your results.

Some will say this is hype and bologna.  However, research shows that 95% of all our decisions are made in the subconscious mind.  The subconscious mind is also highly emotional.  Emotions can be controlled by thoughts.  We can program our emotions and thus desire.  It is of the utmost importance for you to be the entity controlling what is entering your thoughts the most.  If you don’t control that input, the culture we live in will.  What do you want entering your mind?

Take the time to “control” what you put into your mind and your mind will control the output to a large extent.

Rob Wheeler

I read an article today on Fox News (I read both Fox and CNN so I can get both sides) that floored me.  A little boy (Jericho Scott) was disqualified from a Connecticut baseball league because he was too good.  Are you kidding me?

It seems his pitching is a little too accurate and fast.

I bet if he won the spelling bee too fast or the science club project too easily noone would have a word to say other than ‘way to go Jericho’!!!

I am sure this is going to work itself out just fine.  However, this is an example of a serious underlying problem in our society.  We are all working toward the weakest link so that nobody gets offended.  People are saying that this is a developmental league or some other excuse.  Well, its time to develop some skills to hit and its time to develop a sense that you need to work HARD to become good.  So, get to work.  Stop Whining!  Start winning because you strive to meet or exceed excellence.

If we continue to teach the upcoming generations that we are going to coddle you, we are going to place you where it is easy for you to succeed, we are going to build for ourselves a generation of entitled, lazy, “I give up” because it is just too hard young men and women.  Maybe the developmental part of this should be for the parents to realize it is time to teach our youngsters how to handle disappointment, discouragement and fortitude.

Where did our sense of excellence go?  Make sure when you come up against excellence that you strive to meet or exceed the level of excellence that is being “shown” to you as a gift.

By the way, “Kick butt Jericho!”

You are excellent!

Rob Wheeler

No, I didn’t get on a plane.  But with John, Jacob and Linda coming home from Florida, the airport and the “big” plane ride was on Jacob’s mind.  So, we spent today creating two totally different designs on a Park -n- Ride and the logistics for the buses to pick up the people.

Both Dad and Jacob had fun while we were doing it.  As I am creating materials for the upcoming Barriers to Success series, this little activity made me think, “Are there Barriers to Success as far as being a good parent?”

I went, “WHOOOOAAA!”

When I worked at IBM I traveled quite a bit and there were times when I was three weeks out and two days back, three weeks out and two days back.  Talk about a barrier.

Chris, Jordan and John were never afforded the time, my time, with a father that they should have.  Jacob sees me almost every night.  I very rarely travel now.

Barriers to being a good parent can be just as devastating or more than those you struggle with in your career path.  When we talk about life balance during Barriers to Success, I will go through a heart wrenching story in detail about that very struggle.

When I was going through it, it brought me to tears and I have to choke them down even now as I think about it.

I will remember building this Park -n- Ride for a long time to come.  I hope you have many Park -n- Rides in your life.

Rob Wheeler